Sunday, March 3, 2013

"Living is a pretty grim joke, but a joke just the same."* OR "The universe may not always play fair, but at least it's got a hell of a sense of humor."**


   Over the weekend I thought of a really great idea for a sexy, smart, new sitcom for the younger set. It’s about four fun, plucky gals living in Los Angeles and dealing with dating and men and life and careers. But what makes my show different and relevant in today’s fast-paced world is that they’re also Scientologists.

   Okay, I’m just brainstorming here, but I feel like this is exciting. I’m guessing date nights for the gal pals and their men could include “acting workshops” at the Celebrity Center and couples' auditing sessions. The girls could drink cocktails and discuss who has achieved the highest Thetan level. For jobs, they could all belong to Sea Org and stress out over projects having to do with membership training and ecclesiastical development. They would simultaneously be working off their one billion dollar contracts with the Church, so that could also be a source of drama. But they wouldn’t have to worry about rent or food because that’s included with their jobs. So it wouldn’t be like that time on Sex and the City where Carrie worried about how to buy her apartment when it went co-op and Aiden moved out. Or like that time when Charlotte couldn’t find a paying job after her divorce from Trey. They’d always have jobs and a place to live. But, oh crap: Miranda couldn’t belong to Sea Org because you have to give up membership if you decide to have children. Oh well. She could still be a lawyer, then. Wait, this is a new show! None of them have to be the characters from Sex and the City. They can be whoever I want them to be.

   But…if we were to imagine that it was like Sex in the City, this is how the billboards would look:
That's the official Scientology logo up there. NOT easy to draw. But it looks really snazzy, so I'm glad I made the extra effort.

   The fact that they all have to wear naval-looking uniforms to work would really change things up a bit. They wouldn’t get to explore their fashionable sides quite as much. But I have visions of each of them tailoring their outfits to their individual tastes (I've made Samantha's very low-cut, for instance). Sort of like that part in Troop Beverly Hills when Phyllis makes her troop leader uniforms look elegant and fabulous. Or when Molly Ringwald destroys Annie Pott's beautiful prom dress to make it her own because she's a "fashion designer" in (Not So) Pretty in Pink.
   There's a lot you could do with this premise. I'm tired now so I can't write any more about it. But there's a small chance I'll tack some cool, hip ideas onto this post at a later point in time.
   'Night 'night.
*This first quote is L. Ron Hubbard.
**And the second is something Carrie says on Sex and the City.

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